"Like bringing you the newspaper? I can already do that." Hell, he thinks he could easily do all the things Irvin can do, except for catching a stick mid-air and he doesn't see how Irvin could teach him that. "What the fuck do you think I'm going to learn from having a dog all over me?"

Stroking Irvin at least keeps the dog content enough to not howl directly into his face, but Irvin also takes it as encouragement to continue. "Come on, Irvin, Jade needs some love too."