roneal | (no subject)

(no subject)

The market is, objectively speaking, a miserable place. Precious few of the merchandise are happy to be there, nude and bound and collared - sometimes even caged - free for every prospective customer to examine. Few of the customers are happy either. Prices are high, and the press of so many bodies create a stifling atmosphere.

All in all, it is exactly what Jade had expected. He strolls leisurely through the market, not particularly bothered by what is going on around him. It was one of the reasons he had been chosen for this assignment. Today is his first day at the market; he's meant to speak with the vendors, make connections, and walk away with a cheap but handy acquisition.

He's working on the last part now. It's surprisingly difficult to find someone useful and docile, but still with some spirit left - he does not trust the older slaves who are complacent with the system.

It's during his second time looping through the market that someone catches his eye - for all the wrong reasons. He stops, stares at the familiar figure in front of him, an uncharacteristically surprised expression flashing over his face.

Then he's smiling again. He's still unsure if this is a good turn of events, but perhaps he could use this to his advantage.

"My my, I didn't expect to see you here."

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"Tch. Yeah, I can." In the end, what matters most -- to Shinjirou, the only part that does -- is that a woman is dead. And the taste of bile that pushes into his mouth has him swallowing his grin fast. Petting the blanket, he stares at the red rings around his wrists. They're sort of pretty.

"I just don't wanna."

Jade settles down, back propped against the headboard, his body still half-covered by the blanket.

"I'd like you to, all the same." His tone is just as casual as his body language. He's offering a choice, this time, not giving an order.

Next time will be different.

Easy for you to say, Shinjirou thinks and wishes Jade's ease would rub off on him. No, he sits there, slouched over his knees, waiting for the moment to pass. Of course it doesn't, as uncomfortable situations tend to last an eternity no matter what the ticking of the clock says.

"Where, uh, should I start?"

He thought Shinjirou would never speak. The silence stretches on, but just as he's about to prompt him again, Shinjirou finally cooperates. Luckily, that's a question that Jade has an answer ready for.

"You killed someone." Quick and cold, no beating around the bush. "How?"

"I freaked out." Should he lie? The truth would sound more like a lie than any story he could possibly come up with. Then again, this isn't one of the stupid police officers that prefer their simple solutions, this is Jade. That makes one hell of a difference.

Gnawing on the inside of his cheeks, focusing on the physical pain that just barely distracts from the memories of that night, Shinjirou closes his eyes and pretends for a moment to be somewhere else, not that it helps all that much. "We were fighting and she was just ... there."

Not good enough. He continues to press, with no hesitation at all now that he has somewhere to start from. The questions come quickly, almost like an interrogation: "Who were you fighting? And how?"

There's more he wants to ask, but he has the sense to not overwhelm Shinjirou with too many questions at once. These two should provide him with the answers he wants the most, anyway.

"What do you mean, how?" There's a lot to change -- who, not a human. How, well, with inhuman help. He wishes Jade would simply assume that perhaps the woman tried to stop a fistfight between two boys and fell to her death. That doesn't sound too strange.

But trying to remember his own words, he can see why it also wouldn't make a lot of sense. Rubbing his temples, Shinjirou scoots back to lean against the wall. Fuck this. "Do you, uhm. Believe in ghosts and stuff?"

It seems his intuition is correct. There's an element of the supernatural intertwined in all this. But he's roundabout as always when he answers Shinjirouu's question. "Ghosts? I'm afraid I can't say. There's no evidence that they exist, but there's nothing to say they don't exist either. Without proof, I can't dismiss the possibility."

He leans forward slightly, as if they're sharing a secret. "Shinjirou. How is this relevant?"

"Huh." Jade's reaction isn't half as bad as expected and for a second, the urge to tell someone that isn't part of SEES nearly suffocates him. Then Jade is suddenly just a bit closer and the need dies on the tip of his tongue.

Shinjirou merely stares, unblinking. But after a while, he pushes himself to continue. There's no easy way out and he's in no state to come up with a smart plan. "We didn't fight someone."

The emphasis doesn't go unmissed. He doesn't lean forward any further; Shinjirou hadn't reacted positively the first time, and that was enough to deter Jade from trying again. "Something, then?"

He could make a remark about ghosts, but he refrains. He'd rather not distract Shinjirou with pointless comments.

"Yes." There's no turning back now. He averts his eyes, looking for simple patterns. Anything to calm down, really, to make the situation less absurd. "But that didn't kill her. I did."

It's been such a relief, to mostly ignore this part of his world. With Jade always keeping him busy, sometimes he'd almost forgotten. "Does it matter what it was?"

Yes...and no. Maybe he's pushing his luck by asking, but maybe it'll pave the way for Shinjirou to get to the heart of the matter, and above all else Jade is curious. He wants to know just what Shinjirou had been keeping from him, what had escaped his attention for all these years.

"All these factors are clearly related," he says carefully. "It's best if I have the full story."

"Jade." It's the wrong moment to sound whiny and he knows very well that it won't get him anywhere. Still, with barely enough rest to feel about average again, his voice pitches. No please gets added, though, not that he's got any pride left to hurt.

"... if I told you there's one more hour each night that you're not aware of, what'd you say?"

The whine may be understandable, but it's still another troublesome thing to deal with when he's so close to his objective, so Jade is more than pleased when Shinjirou overcomes it on his own. Pleased enough that he gives him a serious answer.

"I can't see how such a thing can be hidden. But I don't think you're lying."

"Tch." Shinjirou shakes his head, eyes closed. "You're crazy for believing that." But he's also right, which makes it hard to sound condescending. It's also nice not to be ridiculed, he's got to admit. Only pain in the ass that's left is to continue.

"During that time, one of them got out. Uh. Not ghosts, not exactly. I don't think you could touch ghosts ..."

He wants more information - how is that hour hidden? Why was Shinjirou aware of it? - but he has the good sense to allow Shinjirou to tell his story with as few interruptions as possible. Unfortunately, he has to intervene sooner than he would have liked.

"Then what is it? A ghost that can be touched?" He can see why Shinjirou was reluctant to share his story. This would be far-fetched, almost ludicrous, if Jade was anyone else.

Shinjirou nods, albeit with some reluctance. Is that a good description for someone who will probably never see one of them? Mitsuru could explain all of this much better, but she isn't here. Thank God she isn't. He withdraws all the same, though within and not to distance himself physically from Jade. Hell, a part of him wants the comfort of last night back, and that makes him squirm, if only slightly.

"You're not some crazy cultist that you honestly believe this shit, right?"

The question elicits a startled laugh from Jade. Yes, now that he thinks about it, he supposes he would be considered a crazy cultist in most circles. But he calms down quickly, running a hand through his hair.

"It sounds a little strange, but I've seen things that are equally unbelievable." He's not going to give Shinjirou a chance to ask about them. "In any case, please continue with your recount."

Hearing Jade laugh is alienating. Smug expressions are hella common with him, but he seems sincerely amused now. Furrowing his brows, Shinjirou opens his mouth to ask what he's talking about. Alas, Jade's faster and so he shuts his mouth again.

He does quietly wonder if that's got anything to do with not being allowed to enter Jade's study, though.

"There's a few people who don't, uh, I mean who know about that hour. So we tried to fend these things off with, with our ... hm." Something holds him back from saying it. He'll have to say it, get the words out from where they're stuck in his throat. Short, quick breaths make him dizzy. And when he finally goes on, the words tumble out of his mouth: "Personas. Don't make me show you, don't do that."

He raises an eyebrow at the slip, a silent question. But he doesn't pursue the point when it's likely an honest mistake - Jade can't imagine there being only a few people who don't know about that hour.

"Personas," he tests the word out, watching Shinjirou's face closely. It's not a term he's familiar with, outside the usual definition, but considering Shinjirou's reaction, these 'personas' must have been what was responsible for that woman's death. "Can you describe them, at least?"

This time, he doesn't feel too bad about shaking his head. He could describe each of them, but in general? No. That won't satisfy Jade's curiosity, probably, but that's just how it is. He shrugs after a second passes. "They're really ... individual."

What worries him the most that Jade still doesn't seem all that perturbed by what he's hearing. Anyone else would be. Words that you've never heard of, creatures and hours that shouldn't exist. Jade acts like it's nothing special and all Shinjirou can do is sit there and babble about it.

"Many look a bit like people, but I don't think they are, or have ever been human."

"Then what are they?" He presses. His mental picture of them is even less clear than the ghosts-that-can't-be-touched. But Shinjirou is having trouble describing them as well, so maybe this is just another thing he isn't meant to understand, just like healing artes.

It stings, a little, but Jade is better about accepting his limitations now than he had before.

"You use them to fight." That was the only clear bit of information he managed to glean. "They must have abilities beyond what you're capable of on your own."

"Yeah, they sure do." And he wishes they didn't. At least his -- he wishes the thing would be entirely useless instead of what it is. On the other hand, he can't blame the Persona for what he lacks. The Persona is him, in the end and he's got only himself to blame for these shortcomings.

"Jade?" He takes a deep breath, pulls the blanket up to his shoulders and beneath that, pushes his thumb into one of the many bruises. Managing not to cringe, all that brings is quiet relief. "Why does any of it matter? You wouldn't be able to defend yourself if Castor appeared, even if I told you everything I know."

Unless Jade thinks he can put up a fight, in which case Shinjirou isn't sure if he wants to know any details.

Castor? "Is that the name of your Persona?"

He doesn't answer Shinjirou's question. He can't, not without revealing things he has no intention of revealing. There's no exchange of information going on here, no one-for-one deals. He doesn't expect Shinjirou to accept it unquestioningly, but they'll cross that bridge when they come to it.

"Yes." So, he's not going to get anything out of Jade. Figures, really. There's little disappointment he feels for something he expected anyway. Jade's behavior isn't any more or less suspicious than what's normal for him. Kind of a relief. Makes the conversation almost ordinary.

"Not every Persona is fit to fight. Castor is." And that sucks, but isn't surprising. He's always fought -- with Aki, with the other boys at the orphanage, and he's never been as fair as Aki. Just a reckless idiot kid. Not unlike a kid, he tries to make himself appear smaller, hunching his shoulders and hugging his knees to his chest.